My son, Jericho, will wake up like the early bird he is next Wednesday to begin his first day of Kindergarten. I am over the moon and teary all at the same time. He’s the apple of my eye and such a spunky kid. He keeps it loud and fun all day long. Little brother and I will wave him off until 3 p.m. every weekday. It will all be so new. In my head, I assumed he was the only one with a big change, but really it’s all of us. While I’m eager for him to step into this next season of life I can find myself with a mix of emotions that all mamas face when their kiddies go to school.
These feelings prompted reflection over our summer. How we spent our time and where we went. Who we spent it with and the pace we chose. All summer long we roasted gooey smores in the back yard with old and new friends. We discovered a new beach where we skipped rocks under the summer sun and waved at the sailboats and ferries. We picked raspberries and blueberries until our fingers were coated in their juices. We had a “night at the movies” snuggled up on the couch with our tikka masala or truffle popcorn. We enjoyed play dates with sweet friends and maybe let the kids stay up well past their bedtime. It was bliss.
In the ebb and flow of our summer, I spotted two reasons why life can so easily be choked of its innate goodness. The goodness that sets us up for a win day after day. The goodness that deepens the wells of love for each other and our friends. The goodness that reminds us even though this life can leave us bone-dry and defeated, in us is joy and peace from the good Lord above.
We prioritize hustle over heart. I used to think hustle and heart were the perfect combination but now I think it may be like oil and vinegar. The hustle and bustle of life can leave our hearts hurried and worried. It demands we attend to the urgent and ignore the important. It can leave the health of our own souls and the lives we care for in the dust. Don’t get me wrong, I love hustling for a dream or project as much as the next person, but if it’s a gear I’m in all the time, then that’s called overdrive. I can’t live in overdrive. My heart, beating and tender, needs a minute to breathe.
As a former hustle-holic, I can tell you this is a big one. We wear ourselves out in the name of ________________ and then wonder why our heart is left ragged and raw. We are convinced our cause matters and everything takes second place to our hustling hard. Let me remind you, we were not created for such things. We must take a moment, a day, a week to tend to our hearts. With our families, and alone, it’s a fruitful endeavor to rest our hearts. Psalm 23:2-3 tell us, “He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake.” I pray goodness finds you through the gift of tending to your heart, allowing Jesus to restore every inch of you.
Another reason goodness evades our treasury is because of our tendency to share our highs but never our lows. Celebrating with others your victories is exciting, dare I say fist-pumping worthy. Your lows, though, not so much. Sometimes, we can feel too much as we unload the truth of our seasons. We can assume our friends don’t want to hear the mess, but you know what? When we share the mess we allow them to love us and lend us their strength. It’s easy to sit on your couch and keep your junk to yourself as the tears sneak out of the corners of your eyes as you re-watch The Office. It’s difficult to sit at the dinner table and expose your wounds, fleshy and raw. It’s messy, knowing your friends might judge your situation, or even worse, you. Your fears tell you that you’ll tear down the friendship you are trying to build. Assuming our friends are of high character, I find the opposite is true. I find that when we share our lives, the highs and the lows, we taste the fruit of Jesus. His kindness. His gentleness. Galatians 6:2 tell us, “share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” His law is love, not judgment, fear, or isolation. Love.
We lend our love, grace, and hope when we are willing to listen to our spouses, children, and friends in their most dire of times. You see, our suffering, our pain, makes us equal. The other night, I had a garden party with women from Sip. After plates of English white cheddar, savory dolmas, and fresh pineapple we sat listening to each other share ups and downs. The ups were so sweet and the downs led us to prayer. We offered hope and comfort, with sighs, smiles, eye contact, and words of encouragement. 2 Corinthians 8:13-14, reminds us, “For this is not for the ease of others and for your affliction, but by way of equality– at this present time your abundance being a supply for their need, so that their abundance also may become a supply for your need, that there may be equality;” The words of Paul to the Corinthian church asking them to do what they can because they have the means, is a message for us today. When we have resources, emotional, financial, spiritual- we can offer them to another. When we are lacking may the prayers and strength of our friends be offered our way. It’s an honest way to live, one that insists on transparency and vulnerability. That, my friends, is a good thing. Downright good.
May goodness find us through tending to our heart. May we put the hustle in its proper place, as a gear to use but not a way to live. May goodness find us through vulnerable relationships. May we be full of grace to give and a safe place to receive another’s burdens. May we be women of truth and hope as summer dances into fall. As warm summer nights fade to crisp autumn evenings let this be true of us.
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Need a rest? Check out why mama needs a minute. Are you wanting to scream at the people around you with a dirty house and checklist that won’t quit? Read why you should bless them when you want to scream. Feeling low? I have something that might help.